July 8, 2005

Jeb left last night for a trip to Arizona and as soon as he left the dogs got whimpery, whining when he didn't walk back in through the front door. I finally got them settled down and when it was time for bed I let them out one last time. Or at least I tried to.

It's been raining pretty hard out by us lately and yesterday was just a constant flow of rain. So the dogs, of course, were pretty little princesses and acting like four legged divas who couldn't dare go out in the rain, lest their furry little coats get wet. Prodding, pushing, begging and pleading fell on deaf ears so off we all went to bed.

Where Ava proceeded to growl softly at the slightest noise she heard - which were aplenty, considering we were bedding down on the top floor of the townhouse, closest to the roof where the rain was steadily falling. I turned the TV on to some historic Jamestown special and the volume was enough to drown out the noises that were disturbing Ava.

But around 1:15 a.m., something disturbed me from my sleep. Marley was licking my cheek, trying to wake me up as if to take her out. And upon waking I discovered that Ava had peed the bed next to me. Great. Just what I wanted to do in the middle of the night, strip the bed. But I did just that, dumping the soiled linens on the floor, before taking the dogs out again. Oh yeah, I mean, before TRYING to take the dogs out again.

Rain was still pouring, dogs were still being divas. Nobody was going out side, least of all me, so off to bed we went again. Of course I couldn't get back to sleep right away so I stayed up reading this week's issue of TV Guide. (And here I thought Jake Gylenwhat'shisname was playing the flame guy in Fantastic Four, but it's really Chris Evans who I've seen before as the big jock dumbass from Not Another Teen Movie). Ahh, sleep, finally sleep.

And then it's 6:15 a.m. only a short while later and I'm waking up to the alarm. I can hear the rain still falling outside the bedroom window but I'm hoping that enough time has passed for these prissy pooches and they'll have to potty, rain or no rain. Oh, okay, more like, pee or no pee. Yeah, no pee. Marley walked out into the rain reluctantly but of her own free will. Ava was followed into the den and carried to the door where she was pushed into the rain. Hey, I even had my umbrella open for them, so they could at least squat without the rain falling on them. But no dice. They weren't falling for it. They knew it was raining, despite my valiant efforts to shelter them in style with my Coach umbrella. They stood there in the rain, frozen in place, staring up at me with forlorn eyes, as if to say, "Why are you doing this to us? Why are you torturing us this way?" I let them back in and went to take a shower.

Dried and dressed, I made my way back downstairs to put the dirty sheets in the washer and to try letting the girls out one last time before I left for work, only to find a surprise at the bottom of the stairs. Apparently Marley had relieved herself of her poopy in lieu of actually crapping outside... where I had taken her only a short while before. And once in the middle of the night. And once before we went to bed. And once when Jeb took them before he left at 9 p.m. Oh no, Marley saved it all up until I was upstairs in the shower with Ava laying on the bathroom floor. With a sigh I tried letting the girls out to no avail. They weren't having it. It was raining, it was wet, they weren't going, dammit, and quit trying to make them!

Well, it stopped raining sometime late this morning and I'm hoping it's dry out by our house, too. When I get home the girls will bound outside to eagerly do their business, only they will be confronted with a wet ground. While they will be joyful for clear skies they will curse the dampness beneath their feet. Ava will walk funny across the rain soaked deck, lifting her legs at awkward angles, as if to shake the moisture off her legs. Marley will squat, sort of. Enough to pee but not so much that her bottom comes anywhere near the damp ground. And when they walk back inside they will become bursting bundles of energy, shaking off any remaining droplets that dare cling to their pristine coats, and they will act like purfect little angels once again.

While I finish laundering the dirty sheets... and Jeb gets a tan in Arizona.

that was then - this is now